Tuesday, August 27, 2013

'Jalah'

i feel unworthy of your glance
because
hope springs eternal from your smile
its like when sunrise meets baby's laughter
an intoxicating innocence
getting me lost in the chapter & verse of your testimony
anytime you speak.
its real
i heal a little more
listening to a
transformative wordsmith living in your truth inspires
sometimes
i like to daydream in the belief that had we met sooner
we wouldn't be a disaster waiting to happen  
and
i wouldn't be the next person to break your heart
even if you grant me redemption
i'm still a symphony of catastrophe
and you
a nubian queen too good for the likes of me
a life lived dangerously
perhaps you like to flirt with death and destiny
walk tightropes of propriety till proven right
that there is no wrong way to live.

against better senses i dare steal a kiss
in back yards illuminated by envious stars
i inhale your light
as if a human defribulator
jumpstarting my heart back in to a now-now time signature
with the future as a possibility
the present a security
and the past
a distant memory.

  
  
th
never do i wish to

Love & Light,

C. Joi Sanchez
www.jsanschez.wordpress com

<3 & Art,


www.artlovesher.wordpress.com
www.jsanssayz.blogspot.com

Sunday, August 25, 2013

'ashley'

i still have your bracelet
i wear it on my wrist with prayer beads
praying one day soon i'll forget these
feelings i had for you that now cause flames to consume me anytime i see your face
its not the loss if the possibility of love that angers me
its that i began to let go of the hurt i hold
reminders of what love shouldn't be
just to be given more of the same
i feel as if i'm just the last in the long line of suckas
who have fallen victim to your game
and i know i'm smarter then this. writing angry love poems until you don't exist seems like the only way to remove you from my memory
because eventhough i deleted the pictures you took for me
those images gone but emblazened in my psyche
the memory of you in sun kissed onyx skin
you shined like the moon unaware it was meant to set
and now
whenever my eyes meet darkness  i still dream of you
still dream that you care,
delicate hands stroking my tears as i shared myself with you.
so yeah 
i think you're evil
until i figure out how to stop wanting to love you.




Love & Light,

C. Joi Sanchez
www.jsanschez.wordpress com

Thursday, August 15, 2013

Queen's Gambit

for the honor of this pleasure
I absolve myself the necessity.of reciprocity
my only goal is to engulf you
mind, body, and soul
all my time would be about you
learning what and how you like it
give it to you till you love it
till you dope lean like an addict
and then some more
simce there's no need for me to rush
i let my imaginatiom relish in the details
beginning with your mind
i'd whisper revisions of Pablo Naruda lines
talkin' bout
i wanna do with you what
nature does to cherry trees in the spring time
nourish your roots and
bring you to blossom
i think its awesome
how you let me take control
it cool if  you need to take a moment
breathe
and let go
of any expectations
while you're at it
be sure to clear your schedule
i'm an all nighter
so this may take some time
like poetry flows without rhymes
you may get a little lost
or exhausted.
and i won't lie
i want your body
every last drop
i want to drink you in like
a bottle of well aged kiante
slowly inhale the aroma
of your honey suckle skin
take small sips of your essence
from clavical to navel and back again
while swirling your nipples playfully
i'd caress the stresses from your back
so you know that you're safe to be free with me
i need you to be fully relaxed for the optimum pleasure possible
i'm not quite sure its possible to mentally prepare someone
as lovely as you for what is yet to come.
but i will try moving on
once your stress is gone
letting my hand glide down past ass & thighs to knees
i am a blind woman
using the goosebumps as a manual
on your body to read
exactly how to please you
they tell my mouth to proceed down your torso
the only decision to to make
is whether to lick a path of love poems in invisible ink
unseen to the eye
forever etch on your soul
of if you'd prefer to be bitten
a trail of evidence for the world to know
you've found your golden ticket
this isnt a decision that pick
and so I
ocxupy the wait time exploring the curvature of thighs and clalfs
build your anticipation higher then the peaks of Mt. Everest
until you beg for it
make you scream for it
grab hold of my head and
serve yourself up to me
a dish of royalty
i gladly bow my head to the queen
place a kiss of passion
long and deep
a whore in church
i remain on my knees
paying homage, asking for entry
call me alice
lost in a wonderland,
you the lock
my tongue the key
giggling, stirring
shaking
until i unlock your mystery.

;-) i hope you enjoyed reading this as much as I enjoyed writing this. <3

<3 & Art,


www.artlovesher.wordpress.com
www.jsanssayz.blogspot.com

Tuesday, August 13, 2013

'julio'

i admit
i'm not here
non-compliant with life
i'm stuck on the memory of a love meant to last a lifetime
i play pretend in reality
acting as if everything is just fine
but really i'm losing my mind
on a slow drift to insanity

i have empty affairs to fill the void you left
pretty faces that don't mean much to me
i build them promises of sand castles
as they
bask in my hollow embrace
i sometimes see you staring back in their faces
of momentary love
the next day its always the same
washing them away with the soap on the same brown skin you once laid kisses
reminiscing,
i watch them fade through the drain with the hope i can love again
the same way i once loved you.

Love & Light,

C. Joi Sanchez
www.jsanschez.wordpress com

Monday, August 12, 2013

Brought to you by the letter "Ff"

i think its time that i admit,
while i may  love every minute if it,
our time might be at an end
that maybe it best to not be more then friends,
i'm mean just friends,
no benefits
because
i was starting to believe you were heaven sent
and i can feel that way alone.

i'm also unsure if i am okay playing second fiddle on my own dates
and i know you said you don't want to date anyone,
that all you want is to have some fun.
with me.
thats okay,
just dont get mad when i don't call you for a few days
or look at you the same when i know he's had you today.
  don't complain that i'm not engaging enough,
as if i should share my intimacies with one not interested in learning my heart.
see with me lust is not connected to love,
so all that romantic shit get saved for someone
who can appreciate it
who is
open to being loved,
and even more returning it
openly 
see i can't agree
to be apart of the white girl wasted secret lesbian society
i dont see why you cant just embrace your queerness and admit you like some variety.
in your life.
no judgements
no shade
i'm just saying
i'm not about that life no more.
i been busted through my closet door,
and stepped into my truth.
i am living proof
that no one cares if you don't
so stop saying you will when you won't.
don't oblige me in fantasy
if the minute you're alone with me, its no longer comfortable to be holding my hand in city streets,
or cuddle up next to me
or.kiss me goodbye
this poem is not about hetero-normalcy
its about you and I
and all the reasons
i can no longer be your secret
adventure
thrill ride
good time,
anything more then a one night
hittter quitter
see you later sister
catch you on the flip side
or pehaps next lifetime
when you know what you want
and are ready for it
when you can express your sexuality and not feel shameful.for it
when i can be someone you adore
when you're ok being my cherie amour
and we don't have to hide.
until then,
only hit me for a good time,
a one night.
a forhead kiss
and "see you next time"

Love & Light,

C. Joi Sanchez
www.jsanschez.wordpress com

Tuesday, June 11, 2013

For Niya (@4)

This poem is for my daughter
She doesn't know it yet
But one day she will need it.
Because she will need me and i won't be there
Her questions will demand answers
but will find only silence
i see it growing
The silence between us
Like the distance and time apart
It grows
And so i wrote this this poem  for my daughter
Because one day she will need it
And
She doesn't know it yet
But one day someone will break her heart into a million pieces
And she will want to wonder why in the space of my arms
And she will will have tears when i tell her that there are no aswers to her questions
That this sometimes happens when you let yourself fall in love
She can find peace in the pieces she is in and save herself
But She won't believe me
and so i wrote this poem is for my daughter
She doesn't know it yet
But one day she will need it.
Because she will need me
and i won't be there to greet her like the sun
Daily
Because she looks for me
Sometimes cries herself to sleep questioning why momny would leave.
And she will have tears when i tell her she is the answer
Because mommy wanted to be better for her daughter
Because a brown girl raised in abusive atmospheres believe themselves unworthy .
And i can't teach her to be invaluable by selling myself short
I wrote this poem for her to know how much she is valued
And cherished
And loved
And deserves the best of everything
And she and poetry are synonymous as the best of me so
This poem is for my daughter
She doesn't know it yet
But one day she will need it.
Because she will need me
and i won't be there
But my memory & especience will
Forever in these words
This poem is here for when she has words for me
When she rebels
spewing words of anger anchored in truth
When she starts keeping secrets, sneaking out,
repeating history
This poem will take will make her question herself
It will laugh at her answers and teach her that none of us really know what we're doing
That we all do our best everyday for those we love
And she will know she is
/was/
will be loved no matter what.
Which is why
I write this poem for my daughter
Because she will need it
She doesn't know it yet
But she will need me
and i will be here
Forever
In word.

Love & Light,

C. Joi Sanchez
www.jsanssayz.blogspot.com

Friday, May 24, 2013

No Shade

**You ever just need to vent about things you see and hear in the world? Yeah this is that moment in rhyme when I needed to get shit off my chest. If you are tagged please drop your opinions/feedback/etc below. Enjoy!**


this poem is for those that
think i don't see your true colors showing
understand within my quiet is a knowing
that it won't be long before you take yourself away from me.


there are many ways to make art
yours in not synonymous with success
just because it works for you
doesn't mean your way is best

while others can do what you can do
we don't all operate the same
much like how we don't all have the same name
or play by the same rules in this game

we all make it in our own ways
what matters at the end of the day
is who was there to support when the time came
whether you stood by me through the sunshine and the rain

did you do more then offer up more of the same
shouting your disbelief from my corner
patting my back with hands that bury me in public
forgetting we're all out here because we love it

i work harder then most will ever know
spread praise on all that came before me
extend an open hand as to not waste any opportunity
keep my faith to myself, so opinions of others will not ruin me.

will not discourage me from continuing
walking where HIS sight has led me
sharing the food that She has given me
until my dying breathe, i will see us form community

while you continue to compete
defeat your purpose with your unconscious duplicity
think i'll be nothing without your support of me
i have the support of creation, all Its magnificence is working through me

so please do me, and you a favor
before you  call me trash
offer up some advice or a helping hand
& then decide where it is you stand

In Memory

She
brown skinned
stocky
joy filled
exuded all that you'd expect from a lady
and then some

she
educated and educator
taught me lessons of womanhood
my child mind wasn't ready to absorb
yet
still she tried with me
took her time relaying lessons
of her experience

like
how to be a brown woman
with class
like how to check my smart mouth
how to hope
 and to remember that one day
i too will be old
and wise

like she
not of my blood
yet bound to my soul
and memory
on this day i sit in silence
remembering
let the skies spread the emptiness i still feel with her loss
on this day of her birth

i hope i have made her proud
i hope she watches me
with the same smile that greeted me like the dawn.
i hope she has found her love
& her family

i hold her hope in my heart
mingled with memories that will never fade
she remains
the best part of me
that i give away
because she of what she gave to me

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

Reses pieces

it seems that
even we
have whitewashed our brains to believe
our own neighborhoods arent safe
That we
cant protect each other,
that we
dont look out for others
with brown faces
Makes sense
as to why every new generation has led themselves more astray then the last
Why broken fences and blood stained concrete
seems to be
criteria for what every black hood must have
As if,
it would kill us to keep the peace.
Maybe
If we became conscious of our own energy,
we'd recognize that our true enemy
is not those boys in blue patroling our streets
Its the you and me that deny what our heart beats
and our souls know to be true
We hold the power to change the world,
our lives are living proof.

Love & Light,

C. Joi Sanchez
www.jsanschez.wordpress com

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

Help :-)

I could please myself
But there's nothing like cuddling
Nothin' like some good lovin', when its been a while

Nothin' like seeing the sunshine in her smile
When morning kisses are wrapped in last nights satisfaction
Laying in the calm aftermath of expressed passion.

Nothin like having a fraction of happiness all to myself
Finding peace in someone else, after embracing it within myself
Living in the freedom where I can
admit I want a little help
Even though I can please myself.
Committing to absolutely no one else, but me
I create the possibility
for love given and love received
I don't need anyone but me

And I could please myself
But there's nothing like cuddling
Nothin' like some good lovin', when its been a while
Since i've needed
Even more since i've been wanted
And boy do I love it!
my lover takes her time
Taunting me with her tongue in a rhythm timed
To match my hearts beat.
Making every moment with her even more sweet
For lovin creates a melody i carry in me and sing sweetly everyday

I could please myself
But there's nothing like cuddling
Nothin' like some good lovin', when its been a while

Especially when its been a while
sometimes i get nostalgic
all i want is that ol' thang back
Some throwback love
Some Love me so good its like i'm loving myself type love
Being with a lover that knows all my body's nooks and crannies
Exactly how to spank my  fanny
Jumps right in it cause he knows how to romance me
Tell me for what reason should I ever give this up?
When love is so good, can you ever get enough?
So don't fault me for drinking the blessings poured in my cup.

I could please myself
But there's nothing like cuddling
Nothin' like some good lovin', when its been a while

Love & Light,

C. Joi Sanchez
www.jsanschez.wordpress com

Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Like Mother, Like daughter

Like mother
daughter sits at the mercy of hands that can easily overpower her tiny frame
She sits within the same stillness of her firey name
Making the struggle worse then intended
Like mother did
when she chose to end
the toxic cycles of a love unintended

Like mother,
daughter sits
shedding rebellious tears over unavoidable pain.
Knowing the consequences
she still takes part in the game
yet falls to anger  everytime the rules change.
Unable to anticipate the play,
she quits as if the only way
Like mother,
daughter was angry inside.
Born with an unsettled spirit,
a waste of potential as mother scolded, 
daughter was a spioiled, lazy, bitchy, crazy,  whoring brat
the way mother told it.
daughter would hold those words in her throat until she was too old to swallow it.
Like mother,
daughter abandons home with no destination but gone.
Its not long before she finds mothers eyes in her own.
Can recognize what mother dispised; herself
wishing more of her love survived her absenses
daughters face was simply a reminder of when she was someone much closer to her true self. 

To be like mother was daughters greatest ambition.
For hours she sits watching through cracked mirrors
at the reflection she stands to inherit.
Wonders if
she too will disguise the beauty she is proclaimed to possess.
Or if like daughter,
mothers mask keeps out the unwanted.
Hids true intentions and heartaches
plans insessently,
and dreams of greatness.
like mother, 
daughter will cover up the true colors of love written on skin.
she too will buy two shades lighter to compensate for the added hues of black and blue.
Like mother,
daughter wonders if love is tru & blind how its aim could be so accurate,
its touch be so rough?

Like daughter,
mother covers up
the wrong with a blanket of righteousness and smiles.
She learned quickly to speak blunt wisdom
with the ease of sweet tea.
For mother
diverting attention
from violent intentions became something of a specialty.
So much so she became a personality,
living a life of luxury,
something like a fantasy, glamerous & empty,
too fantastic to return to reality,
so she hopped onto a pipe dream, never truly returning,
daughter is stll searching for mother in her eyes.
Like mother,
daughter weaves a tangled web of lies,
searching for alabis to redeem her. Justify the decision to remain prisioner to her irrational fears.
In daughters darkest hour
is when the pattern appears
and she finally understands,
there is no difference between them,
just time and distance.
Because even though they never shared a name,
& their circumstances differed
they both turned out the same.

Love & Light,

C. Joi Sanchez
www.jsanschez.wordpress com

Monday, February 11, 2013

Lesbehonest (coldest winter ever)

My mother recently asked:
Why am I a lesbian
After a laugh,
I just asked: "well where should I begin?"
Maybe because
I have decided i want a girlfriend.
And not just any girl,
I want her,
The grown girl,
standing alone on her own,
in other words,
a woman 
Its not because i'm sick of men
but because i'm sick of the bullshit around me.
The clothed sword fights never cease to astound me.
Because I don't wish my pussy to experience violent sex.
Being banged out or beat up is not what I call love.
Because when i was lost and forgotten,
she is who found me.
When he said i was worthless she said that I was worthy.
Because he feeds off of me, so when i am hungry,
only a feast of the sweetest fruit can restore me.
I want someone i don't need to explain my moods to.
That will ride the monthly wave of emotions, holding my hand in silent solidarity. 
Forming symbiotic connections through chocolate and chic flicks. Someone that its okay to for me to cry with,
for no reason at all,
she will become my wall,
damning outsiders,
protecting the treasure of my queendom.
I want her to be my partner
Because sometimes i want be a fool,
And fall in love if i want to,
Because no love compares to that of a woman &
I deserve to
have my heart handled with care and compassion, 
I want someone who will share my passions
not look at me like I'm an addict cause I drool over the latest pair of steve maddens.
Someone who understands that sometimes shit happens
And though this road we travel may be laid with the brick of good intentions,
sometimes I slip,
so when i come groveling in shame,
she'll remind me we're all human &
We make mistakes
Because i have mommy issues and a tendency to require unconditional love
without my partner being executioner, jury & judge.
I want her because she is  poetry in motion,
when her hips sail smoothly in line with well scuplted muscular legs in those heels!.
Oooooh lawd!
Takes my breath away
The way she pulls my had to her waist
to dance with her
because feeling heat is fine
but sweat is sweet when the source is divine.
Because I want someone i can love with my mind.
Someone who will find it fine
if i take my time getting to know her,
helping to grow her
and myself.
Because mother,
I want a lover
who knows my wealth is hidden beneath layers of hurt,
& she is an archeologist digging deeper,
past skin to shoulder height holes of dispair
She digs until she sees the light inside my soul,
Spins prose into gold,
healing the old wounds with the power she holds
She Knows my time is valuable
So she doesn't waste a milisecond with small talk
Her ideas are big and bold
She's a woman who knows how and when to take control
Her knowing for
stronger am I .
This master Jedi,
the force is strong in her.
Just a little stronger and
she could fight the voice that says this love is wrong for her.

Ma, stopspeaking as if this is blasphemy
Maybe I'm a lesbian because that's the only word you have for me
or
Because my energy doesn't know its place,
because sex and gender don't always occupy traditional space.  and i think its okay to express love how ever you feel it.
For a person it is real with
Because I want to love her,
she who asks for nothing in return.
The one with the sad eyes, refusing to acknowledge how loud her heart cries out to me,
through late night convos in shared sheets,
with no idecency,
she makes love to me with her vocal tones & melodies. 
She who has been battered, bruised, broken and burned.
I want to love her for as long as the world turns,
no matter how long i must wait for my turn,
because i know from that moment on i will be her first,
her last,
her everything.
And she will bring the spring
to this endless winter
I call a heart.
Love & Light,
C. Joi Sanchez
www.jsanschez.wordpress com

Monday, February 4, 2013

Thanks for the love

Former lover,
I want to say thank you for leaving.
For giving me reason to cry.
I couldn't fathom how you'd leave me when you pledge me your forever.
But that was then, this is now
A new day
I have found a new way
Better yet a new love
One that I have always dreamed of
All those times when my toungue tied up and waterfalls would wash me into invisible
When there was nothing more to be said
I ran so fast and furiously from my pain
& right into her arms because
She waited.
Never in the same place twice.
But always with arms open wide
inviting me to partake of her.
She doesn't embrace me,
she engulfs me.
From the tips of my toes to the top of my head.
She the best.
My reason for breathing.
Spark to my flame.
She drowns out your pain like a shot of novocane but mixed with cocaine.
Cause i can't be clark kent in her presence
no known weakness' remains.

She's all you said was wrong but proven right
Its the opposite of what i get from you caused by what i get from you. She is cataclysims of  emotions, she is the suns rays warming oceans.
She is the change of the tides,
she brings the strength to my stride,
she makes everything alright when I am staring down the barrel of a shotgun begging for life to end. She takes time and allows me to take mine.
She gives me pause.
A reason to remain still and calm until peace comes from the pieces you broke me into.
So lover i want to say thank you. For leaving me broken and angry. Releasing your grasp
so I can be free
and find the love I found with me.

Love & Light,

C. Joi Sanchez
www.jsanschez.wordpress com

Thursday, January 31, 2013

Re: Naturally a Disaster

Naturally
This could be disasterous
Mixing fire with air
Is just asking for a massacre
Or it may be a masterpiece
Its all in perspective
What you choose to see
Like others look at my harmony as crazy
As if to be daring,
consistantly sharing the hidden pieces of me
is a definitive indication of my insanity.
Not her, she gets it.
Sees it as fulfilling the destiny
I was born into.
Perspective
Glass half full vs half empty
I wonder how many,
times she has given the same excuse in order to not be loved.
I wonder if i ran with arms wide open through her celestial rains to the eye of brewing storms
If she let me keep her safe from harm.
See my storm chasing as fearlessness in the face of resistance
I steadily keep the course charted by love
Direct from my spirit to hers,
i hope she knows my bag is always packed
in case of emergency all she need do is break the glass.
I will stand watch in day
and at night, keep vigil for her safe return to herself.
She says she is a disaster
So naturally this mixing of fire and air may be disasterous
Or maybe once perspective shifts it could just be a masterpiece
All depends on what you choose to see

Re: Naturally a Disaster

Love & Light,

C. Joi Sanchez
www.jsanschez.wordpress com

Tuesday, January 29, 2013

The Stickyness of Honey

The old me would have started drama.
Would have directed attention to the situation
as to make it the "attack" you've made it in your mind.
The younger, less evolved,
more self involved,
version of me would have gathered all our mutual friends for a viewing of your hypocricies. Popped popcorn,
served refreshments,
and really have made you the center of attention.
The young me,
scared of her power,
would have cowered in your presence,
crumbled to her knees begging for the opportunity
to be back in your good graces. But this me,
the one who sees too clearly her future's reflection,
refuses to re-align her position
to anything less then erect and direct.
I no longer hide behind masks or kiss anyone's ass
when in any given sitiuation.
Even one involving a previous infatuation
will not make me faulter in my resolve.
I prayed for a solution,
came to you with arms wide open and you made the choice to not evolve.
Like so many before you,
you got lost,
in the memory of anothers violation,
putting on me a sanction that is undeserved.
Calling me names as if I came at you wild crazy when
Even in my anger I was humble, still showed you respect.
I put my feelings down
but to no names was it directed. Its okay,
i now understand
i can't force you to be a woman, you must choose to be.
You must up yourself to a higher level of existing
before we could ever actually be friends.
Since this is where our journey ends,
i wish you a safe and swift path of peace and enlightenment.
Until we meet again.

Sunday, January 27, 2013

The Essence

You wanna stop the violence
Then you need to break the silence
Cause thats the real killer
Shallow and fickle
she leads you to believe everything is better then what it seems
She's the carrot leading our stallions to live in trap games and pipe dreams
Keeping young women slaves
and turns young men into feinds

You wanna stop the violence,
then stop the silence,
its the silence that wills us
strength to endure grating words and stifle screams
Leaves mother huddled in puddled corners
while fixated eyes of her youth decipher false truths of what a man should be
Equates abuses into lovers way
See silence taught mother it had to be this way
That he only "beats me because he loves me, just in his own way"
It is in the silence that mother taught  daughter to believe
she should never be heard and always only seen
So daughter shifts her focus to that cash money,
her entire world is c.r.e.a.m
Fuck niggas, get money,
So by age 14,
she had lost her virginity 
Misplacing values like the keys for her shiny new mercedes
Daughter is now the next video hoe-fessional on a small screens
Trading in her platinum for a little bling bling
You say stop the violence but its the silence that is killing us
Made older brother have to hit the block
Two time felon he can't get a job
So he goes with what he got
That semi-auto, or maybe the glock
That late night,
distracted by his scheming,
got knocked by the cops,
3rd time's the charm,
he decides to flee.
Now big brother resides in gangstas paradise,
watching down over me

You wanna stop the violence
then stop this silence,
the pretending,
that you're knowledge is unending because you can read.
Not sharing our knowledge,
asking no questions
repeating all lies
Patronize and antagonize each other
then be willing to pop a pill to get by
instead of building community
not networks,
I'm talking organic unity
What happens when we think of a we and not just a you or me
Where we lift our voices loud and declare we are her
e and we will not continue to live in a state of dispair.

Its in the silence  when we fail to comprehend
that nothing is what it seems
and that bitch known as pride
only leads to a fall so steep,
you may never land.
And no one will hear you scream.

Love & Light,

C. Joi Sanchez
www.jsanschez.wordpress com

Saturday, January 26, 2013

Holla back

[**please note: this is a call and response poem, written for performance]

When i raise my hands i want you to say poet [**]

Get it?
   Got it?
       Good!
Lets try one time..

I am a ** (poet)

Damn right i am
And a dope one at that
From my first time at bat
I been doing my thing
Cause i am a ** (poet)

A person of enlightenment
Telling truths to teach you something
But will you listen as i shine in the light.of my soul's glow?
Or will you continue to speak without listening
Regurgitating all the shit you don't know
About me?
I am a ** (poet)

A potentially over-enthusiastic talent passing time in a race amongst rats
Roaring queen of the jungle but i refuse to eat scraps
i go the route of starving artist
Giving energy to the grind
So my hustle is nourishing to the body, soul, and mind
I am a **(poet)

A preview of every thing to come
The past, present, and future wrapped into one
i share my gift wih you,
the worthy,
The nerdy,
The strong and the hurting,
those in need of healing,
Those who share my feelings that when the madness ends
someone will need to step in and lead us.
Trust my words
the world will always need us, to serve up more then the bullshit they feed us
I am a** (poet)

I know the revolution will not be televised
because we never believed when they told us lies,
whitewashed our history to damn near extinction,
replaced our crowns and treasures with cautionary measures, 
putting on full display their fears of us
I am a **(poet)

I know our power lies
in the soul we lay on lines
and not online,
cause we live our lives in real time not virual reality.
Its no wonder these busters don't  have a grasp on reality,
cause its too harsh for their "delicate sensabilities"
and if it were up to me
they'd all get a bullet to their medulla abongatta
Some shit thats spoken makes me channel the  honeymooners
["why i aughtta"|
But i don't cause
I'm a ** (poet)

I know the power i hold comes from a souce greater then me.
I'm plugged in to the outlet of the universe,
violence is so unnecessary.
I'm a ** (poet)

A person of enlightenment telling truths to teach you something about peace,
about harmony,
and about being.
I'm not always lyrically inclined to complexities in my word play cause i want everyone  to understand what i am saying.
This is not an attack on those who are
just my way of relaying my deep admiration.
So deep in fact
i don't dare immitate them.
So you know its real.
That there is a message here. 
for you.
Love jesanschez the **(poet)

Love & Light,

C. Joi Sanchez
www.jsanschez.wordpress com

Thursday, January 24, 2013

Untitled [for you]

She is to me
everything that life should be
Warm,
inviting,
courteous,
kind
With an unparalled inner strength 
voracious spirit
& curious mind
i wish she could be apart of my life
But i am mearly a pauper
Unworthy of such royalty
Her favor is divine
I remain silent in her presence
as if my development was arrested by her enticing manipulation
of language and prose
I fail to possess the vocabulary that is necessary to gain her attention
So secretly
I write love poems
declaring my hidden affections until the day
I am equipped with more then just good intentions
Because
She is to me
Everything that life could be
sultry,
sometimes sour
but mostly sweet
With a
a sunrise in her smiling eyes
i long to get lost in the recesses of her mind
Let her
lyrical voice caress parts
former lovers previously left for dead
Reviving them/me
to a hightened state of being
as she retells stories of triumps and former strifes
i wish we were more then friends in this life/ in time
Maybe in the next go round
Her soul will seek me out
pick up on the sound of my bleeding heart
And we'll dance into moonlight under cloaks of stars
She will let me wrap her in my arms
Become willing victim to my awkward charms
Because to me
She is everything
i want life to be
Dedicated to self yet her giving knows no bounds
She is majestic like the silver lining on dark clouds
or the the eyes of a black panther
Striking in her gaze
Strong in her stance
Patient in her word,
healing in her hand,
sensitive in her spirit,
Protected in a prayer
Wrapped up in the perfection
& beauty of love
If only she could see what I see
She would know
that to me
She is everything life would be
If only she would have me.

C. Joi Sanchez
www.jsanschez.wordpress com

Wednesday, January 23, 2013

Day 2_fin

And so the night concludes
for the heroine,
awash in a sea of beauty,
a favor to a friend

She begins to begin again
Scouring space for spiritual scraps
Eager to be of service
She slinks her body through crowds of brown bodies in heat
In search of a dance

C. Joi Sanchez
www.jsanschez.wordpress com

No words

I haven't written a poem today
Nor did I yesterday
Nor the day before
Not because I don't want to
Because I do
Not because I can't
Because I can
Simply for the fact that my heart wishes not to lie
About feelings I no longer possess.

C. Joi Sanchez
www.jsanschez.wordpress com

Saturday, January 19, 2013

Uncle & father

I watched them from afar
Intensely
Brothers of my blood
As disconnected and unrelative as two could be
Communing in cramped quarters for laughs

C. Joi Sanchez
www.jsanschez.wordpress com

Wednesday, January 9, 2013

Day 4

Today caught me by surprise
Unexpected crowd
the same results
Freestyle
#12DaysofArt

C. Joi Sanchez
www.jsanschez.wordpress com

Sunday, January 6, 2013

1st position

Having never taken a ballet class in her life,
this girl was inspired to write,
not to move,
(a choice proven more suitable for a such a fiery & fierce soul, the voices nearly drove her crazy) though she keeps a steady pace in her race against time & circumstance
Had she only been given the chance
she could've be been a beautiful dancer.
Could've grown up to be a prima ballerina,
clothed in the full facade.
Jet black hair straightened into tight chinion,
glowing skin reminiscent of the recently polished
mahogany piano that plays just for her.
Every note written to highlight her perfect posture &  form,
as practiced as her smile .
She dreams to be
the first
black girl in her hood to do something,
anything!
Other then grow up to be a statistic.
But She never listened
when grand mother would say to stand up strait,
because a lady doesn't walk that way.
She imagines what grandmother would say
if she could see her sweet dumplin now.
Would she be proud of how baby turned out?
Or would she be struck with shock at how madness abounds
How chaos rules her life with a wit sharper then Oya's blades.
How she nourishes herself on anxieties and rage.
Living every moment as it is her last,
because she cast a spell of death on this page.
In history
She is not even mentioned,
not remotely detected in a  retrospective,
Another black girl lost
In her thoughts
she wonders
If grand mother would be proud. If she could see her now.
Would it be a shock to find her puddin'/dumplin'/ funny valentine was a lesbian?
Would she question from whence it began? 
Would she know it was her love that made it possible
for baby girl to understand it was possible to be loved unconditionally?
The possible prima ballerina wonders...
woulds she?
Still love me?
Would christian hearted,
god fearing,
bible toting/quoting
grand mother still love me?
When i am nothing of what i promised to be...


www.sanschez.wordpress.com
www.facebook.com/jsanschez

Saturday, January 5, 2013

Day 2_part 2

Relief fills her lungs with the sudden rush of cold on flesh upon her train station exit.
8:05
She's got time and doesn't plan to waste it.
Platform heels bind size 9 feet into the image of 6's
A whrilwind of steps
Manipulate time & distance
She makes it
5 blocks in 7 minutes
Triumphant
tip toes through back door
As if avoiding paparazzi
The candle light her phone booth
For clark kent transition
5 minute stretch & meditation is needed
A brief conversation with ancestors is healing
She speaks until words are no more

She greets them in silence
Stone face and full of fire
The drums sound
Releasing fury for make believe self-destruction
She Submerge herself in sin
Slink out in bliss
Skin sunkissed by fernels through amber
light Oshuns return
the illusion is complete
As the goddess takes her leave.

C. Joi Sanchez
www.jsanschez.wordpress com

Day 2

A velvet sheeth lays across the sky
Its only 5pm

Hurried steps down cobblestoned streets
Desolation sourrounds her
Is it possibly the zombie apocolypse?
Dead eyes without direction and a foul temper set her on path.

Last minute mantra
Restoring faith in self
During the ten minute wait
Freight elevator
Stand clear of the closing gate
And Wait
Bing
Bing
Bing
Bing
Bing. Here.

Minimalist design

100 people on white walls
200 eyes on her low profile
White wine & brushetta in hand
She stands center of the make shift stage

Enunciation and projection is key
So she slows rhythm
Increases trebel
Drops the bass
In her alto tone
These bombs have no casualties

Muted applause
Exit gallery left
Passing aquaintence
Kind words exchange
Flittering off into crisp winter air
She is satiated; temporarily


C. Joi Sanchez
www.jsanschez.wordpress com

Thursday, January 3, 2013

Day 1

Acoustic guitar switches players like who got next in a checker game
Sit at the grown up table
Play chess
In this cypher of wits
You better be yoyr best
Version if self
Determined with glances
Reflection divine

I am magic
Majeasty
Ethereal body
Extraordinary mind

Sing a song acapella
A blues freestyle

A good night for making music and friends.

C. Joi Sanchez
www.jsanschez.wordpress com

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

Dreamers

She is a lover of love

A hopeless romantic
A dreamer

She believes in miracles
true love
Fairy tales
Happy endings
And every other good thing we teach our daughters to believe

Skipping over lessons of how to fill this constant need
How to not wear her heart on exposed sleeves
Or how to stay together everytime another lover leaves.

So she searches endlessly
Often acting desperately
For a half to make her whole

C. Joi Sanchez
www.jsanschez.wordpress com